I bought my very first glue gun. I know, I know…how did I survive 11+ years as a stay-at-home mom without one?? Well, if you have been reading my blog from the start, you KNOW that I dislike and avoid arts and crafts.
Is it that I dislike or even hate these type of projects, or is the truth that I am totally, undeniably insecure in my artistic ability?
Yes, the latter. I told you I would always be honest.
My sister, Julie, AKA “Martha Stewart” in our family, is gifted in this area. She’s a confident and knowledgeable artist. And cook, and baker, and basically can do ANYTHING, like even lay beautiful terracotta tile… NO, I am not jealous. I am just bragging about my sweet sis. She and God above blessed her three daughters and son in the gene pool with creativity and talent by the way, too. I, on the other hand, don’t have this gene. It’s gone missing.
So I tend to complain and procrastinate when it comes to my kids’ projects. “UGH!” is how I feel inside. And sometimes a few other choice words.
When I realized that Kate, my kindergartener, had to turn in the famous paper “Heritage Doll” in 3 days, I panicked, cringed, and commiserated with other non-crafty moms. Kate was to choose one of her many heritages (Norwegian, Hungarian, Russian, German, Polish, Irish, English), and dress a flat paper doll in a traditional costume.
When Luke was in Kindergarten 5 years ago, I had the good fortune of my amazing mother-in-law, a former teacher, volunteer to do this with him. For me. Without me. I did not do a thing. (Sorry, true confession time, Mrs. Berry.)
And she was excited to do it. A feeling I could not relate to. If she were still on this earth, Grandma Sally would have done it with Kate with fierce enthusiasm.
Bribery might work, I thought. I emailed a creative-confident-with-crafty-stuff friend and offered big money to have her do Kate’s heritage doll. I would pay well! Not really, but I fantasized about NOT having to tackle this. I don’t think teachers realize the anxiety they cause us art class dropout parents.
What does every mom do in my predicament? She marches down to “Joann’s” at the mall and over- spends because she has no flipping idea how to make a paper doll look like a cute traditional Hungarian doll. I bought a glue gun and glue sticks, crushed red and green velvet, lace, gold fabric, and gold ribbon. Oh, and did I mention I shopped at two toy stores looking for a white blouse-type top in the doll clothes section? BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW HOW TO CUT AN OLD WHITE SHEET INTO A BLOUSE. Yep, probably in total, spent $50 plus on it all. Remember, I did buy a glue gun after all.
Kate was so eager to get to work when I laid everything out on our dining room table; glue gun plugged in, warming up. However, when it came down to it, I did most/all of the decorating because she is 6 and cannot use a glue gun without burning herself. In fact, I kept burning myself! (In case you are reading this Mrs. Berry, she did help, and she did color the face and help tape the yellow ribbon hair on her “head.”)
I love boot camp. I love learning new exercises and sweating and pushing myself to new levels of fitness. So could someone Puhhh-L E A S E put on an arts-n-crafts boot camp for me, and a few friends?
Sign me up. RIGHT NOW. Before Kate gets to 1st grade.